Sunday, September 20, 2009

Tracks of emotions

Just wanna post some poems and song i can relate to now by other and by me, enjoy...

A Dream Deferred by Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up like raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore
And then run?

Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags like a heavy load?
Or does it explode?
Talking to myself by me (stupid poem i wrote 5 years ago)

you dont fear anything,
that means you dont love anything
and if you dont love anything,
what's the joy in your life?

no, i do love something, but not in here

then why are you here?

i'm here because of love

what love? you dont have fear to lose it

love is not bonds and joy doesnt need a reason

but you dont seem like you are in joy

love has many faces. it's true, i tell you, i believe.
i might stucked here underneath,
i might have different face,
but i like to believe that i'm in joy.

you're weird and you look stupid

nah, i'm just tired and i just wanna go home
faith will bring you home again, yea.
and haha..weird is cool anyway.

whatever you say

well i dare to say i'm happy

This video clip blew me away, the song; feels like someone's saying it to me :p

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Since when life is a safe bet ?

So guys, the Krakatau trip wasn't safe at all. We're not supposed to land on the shore, instead we climbed the volcano until 100 meters away from the crater/top. Why we stopped at that point, cos then it blew up and puked lots of flaming rocks, dust and other things that in my common level knowledge about volcano can't addressed. The irresponsible guide just suddenly screamed "RUN RUUN !!"...well cos it was impossible to run in such latitude and on a hot slippery/rocky ground, I just stood there, gasp, try to see where the rocks flew and think that i can try my best to avoid them. i had couple of near death experiences, it's interesting; mixed feelings but i was actually didn't think so much, a bit of regret cos i haven't done alot yet but mostly pretty calm :P I dunno about you guys experience, have you got any? hehe..

Before that we actually sailed with small/medium fisherman's boat to Rakata island which is right accross the volcano to put our stuffs and camp there. Before we reached the shore we also witnessed our first couple of explosions that made me really overwhelmed (you can see the video)..and short after that suddenly someone screamed "dolphins!" and there were actually 6 dolphins leading and racing with our boat, i screamed out of joy cos it was so amazing, it was so beautiful i had to cry. That time I really felt God's presence.
In the afternoon after we pitched our tents, we just relaxed/played around and swam and mingled with the waves, then while we floated in the ocean the volcano exploded couple more times but then complete silence...just huge grey clouds elevated from the crater, serene beauty...indescribable..watching the red lava at night while sitting on the beach was very romantic too, then we slept on the beach while watching the stars...beyond perfection >_<
you guys can see the pics on my facebook album called 'A place called home' also albums of my friends where i am tagged. I'm too lazy to upload in different places (you who dont have facebook, i have public link) anyway I'm also lately lazy to take pics.

Other thing that new is I met a guy during in that trip (his dad is half Indonesian half German, his mom is Dutch, but he is basically Dutch), we clicked and had great conversations. I dunno what he saw in me but then the next day after we got back to Jakarta he asked me to show around Jakarta, so one thing lead to another. What I like the most is probably he is more mature than my ex...well people say; don't compare if you don't want to be compared, but i think it's inevitable. well so far he wins lol, so we'll see. But I dunno where to take this, so I'm careful, expect little and taking it easy, but it's nice to like someone again ;)

I start to miss you guys alot, want to hear your stories soon, hit me on skype, msn, everywhere!!

Lots of love,